Last night my husband and I were chatting right before both of us fell off into sleepy land. We were discussing the importance of family. Extended family. The family that most people, generations ago were close to. You had all your family gatherings with them...you know holidays, birthdays, recitals, plays, choir performances, etc...
Grandparents, Uncles, Aunts, Neices, Nephews, Cousins!! Everyone was around! That was generations ago. Most families today don't have that closeness any more.
Think back to when our great grandparents imigrated to this great country. Think back to how everyone helped each other...am I making any sense? Today, most families don't have this closeness...we don't have the same "togetherness". Families are so split up across the country.
Some grandparents choose to move away from the northern cold states to head to warmer climates ( I don't blame them! I can't stand the cold either). But what happens is the grandparents don't develop the relationship with their grandchildren and then they wonder why their grandchildren don't try to visit them or write letters...communication...well, honestly, you broke the lines of communication when you moved away...far away.
I think too, that grandparents forget just how busy life is when you have children still at home. It is not as easy for parents to pack up the family and travel several hundred maybe even over a thousand miles to visit grandma and grandpa. We are still raising our children, we are not retired we are still working.
I wish families were closer together. Joe and I have been alone since the beginning. Shortly after we married we left beautiful South Carolina, for Joe's job, and moved to Michigan. Joe has family here, but it is not mom and dad, sisters and brothers family. It is aunts, uncles, cousins...but Joe had been gone from this area for over 15 years....when you have been gone that long...things change. The family traditions which used to include everyone are not the same because people move, people change...people change things to suit them. No hard feelings at all, just stating the obvious. Speaking of moving....lord have mercy! We moved out of Michigan, to IL (just outside of MO), then on to Mississippi... and now we are back in Michigan...talking about full circle!
People get used to you not being around and they change accordingly. Is this bad? Absolutely not, you must adapt and move forward.
Moving forward: can we bring family back? Can we begin a new tradition with our own children and promise to stay with them so that we can help them when they reach adulthood, parenthood? Watch those beautiful grandbabies? I truly don't have the mindset of raising my kids and then moving away. I love my kids! I want them around. I don't even say, "I can't wait for them to move out, because I don't want them too"! LOL I hope they live close by so we can have wonderful family gatherings...I just promise not to be the mother-in-law that is so nosey and controling that my daughter-in-laws hate me. Ok, enough said....I'm gonna go enjoy my day....I think I just figured out how to make a pine burr block! Ha! Yep, that came way out of left field didn't it?!
Happy day everyone!!
I can completely understand your post. Shortly after I graduated High School, I joined the military, and moved away from my family. I married a military man, and we have moved from post to post.. raised our family, and now we live where work has taken us. I dearly miss my family who unfortunately is across the country. Financially, with a family of six, we couldn't afford to jaunt of to visit as often as I would have liked to.. rarely in fact. I do however call my momma once a week, and keep in touch, see that they are doing okay. It isn't the same. Now, fate has shown me the same cards. My own daughters are across the country. One of them calls me weekly.. the other not. It is great to talk to her. I would love to be able to snuggle my grand children some day.. and be granny who they come to.. I don't have any grands yet.. but I will have to settle for spoiling them with hand made items if I can. Things they can remember me by.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your post Mommarock! I wish our kids grandparents lived nearby so that they could know our kids, but nonetheless they all live in Florida. I hope you enjoy spoiling your future grandchildren with lots of love and *gifts*!!
ReplyDeleteTake care, Nancy